Tuesday, July 7, 2009

menz and boyz

So I remember being really excited to blog about something a couple days ago, but now that I actually have the time to do it, I forget what I wanted to say in the first place. No matter.

I've been thinking lately that I need a man. Or at least want one. Anyone who has been near me in the past couple of weeks knows this. Or anyone who watches the Bachelorette and talks about it with me. Yes, I watch the Bachelorette. Feel free to judge me now.
Well I know most of you are probably tired of hearing this by now, but I'm not expecting any sympathetic responses; I just want to say it and have physical proof that I said it. I feel like I am fun enough and awesome enough to deserve the affections and attentions of a boy. Man. Man-boy. Whatever you choose to call it. Sure, I'm very academically focused and serious about goals, and I'm decently well-read and cultured, but I don't think that should matter at all in this situation. Somehow, though, I get the impression (and I have evidence to back this up) that people find me too judgmental and intimidating. In other words, I have standards. Boys, men, are afraid they won't be able to live up to this, perhaps?

I have no idea. Because honestly, am I that hard to get along with? Really, guys? Gah. I guess it is a little strange, and potentially off-putting, because I'm not looking for a fling or anything. Obviously. But I do want fun, and humor, and to feel comfortable... you know, outside of regular friendship. I admit that I do have far more female friends than male, and although I have tons of fun with them, it's not necessarily a good thing. Too many hormones in one room. Guys are more chill, not uptight, fun to joke with, and they don't take things as seriously. I think I need that as a balancing force. Because I can be really super fun and funny, it's just that some people don't get to see that part of me.

So now I'm seriously considering deleting this, because of course I reread it and I sound like a complete goon who is waaaaay too desperate for some affection. But that's who I am right now. Only not that desperate... ;-) Still goonish.
Yes, yes, the topic is superficial, but I feel like I'm in a bit of a teen angst phase and I deserve to be, for now. Hopefully the next post will be better. Bahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

3 comments:

  1. Angie, I love you. If it helps... adopt the philosophy that my mother gave me: there is someone out there who is perfect for you, and when you are really ready and so are they, you will finally meet (that is the stuff of movies, but still kinda cute). I am in the same place as you, giiiirrrllfriiiiieeeeeend! I have been reading dating blogs/advice a lot lately because as you said, you are worth dating. it will always remain a mystery to me too why ladies such as you and i should be alone. I do think it might have something to do with intimidation, but like you said that shouldn't matter.
    And I am starting to wish I had more female than male friends. I probably do technically, but invested way more time and energy into my guy friends (which sometimes pays off, but mostly doesn't especially when I never see them anymore). Girl friends will be there for you. Guy friends will be there for fun.
    So poop on the universe, we are amazing, and our time will come! Goons unite!

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  2. aww angie. you don't sound like a desperate goon. i think it's perfectly normal to want affection and all that stuffs. it's nice to share something of yourself that most people don't see. and honestly, i don't know why you don't have a guy yet because there is nothing wrong with you. i think it's just that guys are more oblivious to the good things that are right in front of them. and i totally get you on having too many girl friends. but from past experience, i'd rather have a bunch of girl friends who have my back than a bunch of guy friends who don't really know what's going on with me and just talk about their sex lives and silly things. like christine said, girl friends are always there for you in the end and guy friends are just there for fun and silly times.
    thinking back on this comment, i don't think it helped. but you know you can always talk to me about anything ;)

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  3. i know how you feel angie! but i don't think you're desperate at all and it's always good to have standards..i mean why go for the short lottery guy when you can have james franco right?

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